After conveyancer Clinton West had acted quite suspiciously, Schlock Homes and I decided to follow him, intending to get to the bottom of this mystery, regarding the missing conveyancers. People might have found it odd if we actively tried to hide, so Schlock and I simply tried to blend in with the crowd, keeping our …
I’ve lived in a small, stale and musty rental property for the last six months. Sounds gross right? That’s because it is. The reason my house has a disgusting and lingering stale smell is because I’ve been unable to open the windows since I moved in. I’ve been complaining to my landlord and my real …
The first event of the Drain Plumber Games was drain camera inspection, an odd one to start with, in my opinion. Because we were competing in reverse plumber’s alphabetical order obviously I was last, seeing as my name is Steph Jennings. I would have preferred to go sooner but there was nothing to be done …
Ever since I was young, I’ve been a daydreamer. I catch myself daydreaming at least three times a day, and even more when I’m at work. I don’t mind my job, and while I don’t necessarily love it, it pays the bills so it’s worth persevering. But when I’m working I feel like I have …
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a self conscious person. I’ve been ashamed about many things in my life, with the majority of my shame coming from some sort of perceived abnormality of parts of my body. Currently, my feet are causing me serious distress. They are repulsive. I haven’t worn open-toed …
When people think of sentient cars, they generally don’t have a positive response. That’s probably due to all the harmful stereotypes, particularly from horror books and movies. I’ve heard that Steve Prince has written two horror novels about a car that comes to life and hurts people! That’s so unfair. Yes, there have been a …
I might have the most dangerous job in the world. I drive a truck, but it’s not just any truck. I drive the Flaming Truck of the South, as they’ve been calling it on the local news. People love to speculate about what a 40-tonne truck with glow in the dark flames on the side …
Well, it looks like my very first ever petition didn’t get very far. Should’ve seen this coming, especially since the ending to Fantasy was not only divisive, but also very open to interpretation. I bet they did that on purpose: serve the fans a half-baked load of drivel, but make it all ambiguous. People who …
Finally, my masterpiece is complete. This truly is my magnum opus, the greatest work I will ever create. If we were back in the Renaissance, bards would sing of this painting, and the children would grow up aspiring to see it in the Melbourne museum. That’s right, this piece isn’t going in an art gallery. …
Cars: can’t deal with their continual demands on our wallets, can’t get places without ‘em. You know what I’m talking about. It’s a constant stream of expenses, not to mention the nagging doubt as to how long that brake repair is going to hold out after you paid your cousin’s mate to do it in …